Footballers Are Idiots

…when it comes to driving their cars.

CASE #1: John Terry Gives Two Fingered Salute to the Disabled



John Terry deemed it unecessary to act like a normal human being by illegally parking his Bentley in a disabled spot outside a Pizza Express in Esher, Surrey for two hours while he enjoyed dinner with his wife, Toni, and their twins, Georgie and Summer. While photo evidence was collected by practically everyone in the metropolitan area, Terry received a mere £60 fine, pocket change for a footballer earning more than £130,000 a week. What makes Terry even more idiotic is that a 50p-an-hour car park was just a few yards away.

So lets run through what went on in the mind of Mr. Terry:

Should I (a) park in a car park with those simpletons, have to walk a few yards to eat, and risk having my overpriced motor vehicle getting scratched by some ordinary citizen or (b) park in a disabled spot feet from the door, so I don’t have to over exert myself, even though I’m a world class footballer who is more physically fit than any disabled person, have my gorgeous car in an area free from harm, but susceptible to the paps, and get a £60 fine while I will earn 2250 times as much by this time next week…hhhhmmmm…

Link: John Terry Gives Middle Finger to the Disabled

Case #2: Matthew Pattison Gets Arrested for Drink-Driving…in Only His Underpants


Matty Pattison, nicknamed Party, by his fellow teammates at Norwich City, was arrested Sunday morning for drink-driving. The story goes that Pattison was out a nightclub late Saturday after the 2-0 defeat of Sheffield United. Upon waking up Sunday morning, he hopped in his car, still drunk, in just a t-shirt and skivvies, believing he as late for training. But there was no training on Sunday for the Canaries at their Colney training grounds, much to Pattison’s efforts. About halfway through his journey, the police spotted him driving erratically, possibly due to his lack of footwear, and followed the 21-year-old South African, eventually pulling him over just outside the training grounds. Reports that he has checked into a rehab facility have yet to be confirmed.

Link: City Star on Drink-Drive Charge